This week i have sat my first exam in 7 years.
I am doing a psychology degree (stupidly thought it was a good idea).
I have a crap memory, it isn't built for exams. I will find anything to do other than revise. infact i will find anything to do other than study. Reading is hard for me. I find it tiring.
I had to memorise 45 key terms, and 4 chapters. 3 essays in total.
I have no idea how i did. I have no idea if i actually answered the questions or if i just babbled on for 17 pages.
I wasn't nervous/ I don't know if this was because deep down inside i knew i knew it.
On the morning of the exam I couldn't read anything else. I just sat staring at the pages, nothing going in.
I am now avoiding doing my research project. Its due tuesday, its been such a stressful week i can't face it so back to avoiding things again!
Saturday, 18 June 2011
is it just about passing the test?
In the instructor world the answer would be no, its about safe driving for life. In the real world it would be a yes.
Why do pupils put themselves under so much pressure?
why do they choose not to listen to us?
why do they think we are more concerned about the money?
Is it really about the money?
Yes when a pupil passes we have to look to replace them. Sometimes that can take weeks BUT would we really drag out their lessons till that replacement came along? or would we be more worried about an unready pupil damaging our car or someone else? damaging our reputation?
There are the instructors out there who will drag a pupils lessons out, but they are in the minority. A majority of instructors want to feel that when someone passes they are safe and not going to end up in a graveyard. It sometimes is a fine line. If pupil not performing constantly good, you can't put them in for test. It has to consistent, otherwise they will end up in the graveyard. Being accused of dragging out lessons is insulting, especially when said pupil doesn't listen to you and thinks its their right to take a test "just for the experience". My car was expensive, it is my livelihood. To be treated like you don't know and with such little respect, gets me. I do a lot for my pupils (sometimes too much) i try and encourage, always look for the positive, even if im thinking "well that was crap". I won't say, well sometimes i will, they need the truth as brutal as it may be.
Learning to drive should be so much more than just passing a test. It should be about never accepting the, just safe standard. It should be about constantly improving, even when they get that certificate. Never stop learning, learn from their mistakes. Thats what learning to drive should be. Respecting the instructor for thier knowledge, for the fact that they have demonstrated that they are in fact very good drivers. That they do a difficult job, with little or no thanks.
so to the learners that may read this, when your instructor refuses to book your test, take a breath and listen to what they are saying. sometimes they won't be able to give a reason, this doesn't mean they are conning you, it means they are being honest. Approach every lesson as a learning experience, because your instructor will. just because your test is booked doesn't mean you can accept your good, look to improve because it is about so much more than passing your test.
Why do pupils put themselves under so much pressure?
why do they choose not to listen to us?
why do they think we are more concerned about the money?
Is it really about the money?
Yes when a pupil passes we have to look to replace them. Sometimes that can take weeks BUT would we really drag out their lessons till that replacement came along? or would we be more worried about an unready pupil damaging our car or someone else? damaging our reputation?
There are the instructors out there who will drag a pupils lessons out, but they are in the minority. A majority of instructors want to feel that when someone passes they are safe and not going to end up in a graveyard. It sometimes is a fine line. If pupil not performing constantly good, you can't put them in for test. It has to consistent, otherwise they will end up in the graveyard. Being accused of dragging out lessons is insulting, especially when said pupil doesn't listen to you and thinks its their right to take a test "just for the experience". My car was expensive, it is my livelihood. To be treated like you don't know and with such little respect, gets me. I do a lot for my pupils (sometimes too much) i try and encourage, always look for the positive, even if im thinking "well that was crap". I won't say, well sometimes i will, they need the truth as brutal as it may be.
Learning to drive should be so much more than just passing a test. It should be about never accepting the, just safe standard. It should be about constantly improving, even when they get that certificate. Never stop learning, learn from their mistakes. Thats what learning to drive should be. Respecting the instructor for thier knowledge, for the fact that they have demonstrated that they are in fact very good drivers. That they do a difficult job, with little or no thanks.
so to the learners that may read this, when your instructor refuses to book your test, take a breath and listen to what they are saying. sometimes they won't be able to give a reason, this doesn't mean they are conning you, it means they are being honest. Approach every lesson as a learning experience, because your instructor will. just because your test is booked doesn't mean you can accept your good, look to improve because it is about so much more than passing your test.
ending on a high
I am in a very strange place.
Today my car was returned. I become very attached to my cars. Don't know why. I'd chosen the colour, what was going to be in it, everything. Id had it since new, delivered straight from the dealer.
At least it's last bit of work ended on a high, a pass. It felt like the last time i would be at that test centre. maybe it was. starting to wonder if everything over the last six months is a sign that its time to stop and concentrate on my degree.
Since Tuesday my life feels to have changed massively. That letter saying that the company no more was a shock. I am now relying on my franchise to fill my diary again. I have no work which means no money to pay said franchise. The response from my pupils has been heartbreaking, really have let them down. hate it when i have no control of things.
some haven't been very gracious in it, been rude and downright hurtful but a majority have understood that its out of my hands. yes its not nice having to find another instructor, especially when a test is looming, but i can't do anything.
so here i am sat waiting to see what is going to happen. Im taking a breath. sitting back and just looking at my options.
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